3000 miles

This should be everyone’s motto in life – it’ll make things so much better that way. Especially to be honest, of course. Because as much as how everyone says the truth hurts sometimes, won’t it hurt more if the truth was buried among a series of lies, only to be unraveled ultimately that everything has been nothing but a facade? If you really want to hide the truth to protect someone, then do a good job and make sure it doesn’t get exposed in your entire lifetime. Or else the truth will actually hurt a million times more than when you first come clean with it in the first place.

In a reflective mode now that I’m trying to slug through my soci journal entry hmm. Just ignore my ramblings haha. Spent literally HOURS crafting my journal entry, then editing it, deleting sentences after sentences away, to finalize the mere 300 words that I am contented with to submit (and no I’m still amidst all these editing, posting just for a short breather). What’s worse is that there isn’t a specified format, so we absolutely have ZERO clues as to what our entries are supposed to look like.

Talked about this a few nights ago with Yumin, I think the Kpop music industry isn’t what it was originally supposed to be anymore. It isn’t just purely about delivering good music, it’s all about the competition. And it is getting so damn tiring trying to keep up with all the controversies & what-nots, trying to discern who is telling the truth – plot twist: perhaps everyone’s lying. Then it boils down to whose perspective to look at, and what for let ourselves get troubled over this – when the original intention of music should be for enjoyment. Maybe that’s why I’m slowly going back to English pop music (don’t get me wrong I’m still an Inspirit it’s just that kpop as a whole is really, really tiring). I admit the English pop industry is … insane as well. But all’s well as long as I just focus on the songs & lyrics etc! On a sidenote, really excited for Avril Lavigne Live in Singapore, it’s happening in exactly 20 days, so excited *o*

Completed The Fault In Our Stars by John Green, it was a short yet good read. Definitely tear-jerking, and it touched my heart. Felt the bittersweet feelings, it was so cleverly and well-portrayed throughout this novel (‘: Found the other novels written by John Green, can’t wait to start on them after I finish reading The Notebook! There’s something about reading that acts as a getaway, a platform entirely out of reality that makes you wonder, and just wonder. About anything & everything.

Had a pre-CNY reunion dinner with my cousins yesterday, and it was so awesome (‘: Had the tradition to lao yu sheng with cousins, and we do it the Lim family way – adding dragonfruit to our yusheng HAHA lazy to upload the photo here though. Can’t get over how cute my nephew is, baby Kaile has this crazy obsession with phones. He knows how to unlock an iPhone despite being just 1 y-o+, talk about how technology has officially morphed into the lives of kids from such a tender age. And he can’t even speak yet, or rather he speaks gibberish now that sounds so adorable! It was so fun making Kaile crawl around the bed, just so he can get the phone. And he keeps crawling around in the same sequence, it was so hilarious. Babies are so innocent, may he grow up to be a fine guy HAHA. Wanted to play card games with cousins, but initially we couldn’t find any poker cards so … desperate us actually drew the cards out on A4 paper & tore them into poker card sizes. Left the paper-poker card version there, just in case we ever need it again someday.

Went to various places around BV area with Amanda on Friday, it was such an amusing time despite it being a short one. Thank you for the arrowhead chips (it’s so yummy)! And walking around aimlessly seeing stuff etc, and for helping me hold stuff so I have two free hands to hold my skirt down, all thanks to the crazy howling wind omg. Because true friends stay golden, no matter how frequent (or not) meet-ups are in real life (‘:

Everybody is special. Everybody. Everybody is a hero, a lover, a fool, a villain. Everybody. Everybody has their story to tell.

Shall end my post with this quote. Media & culture journal entry, we meet again x

Unapologize

MIDWEEK UPDATE. 1.5 weeks of lessons in Y1S2 has passed, it has been relatively hectic I don’t understand why (especially since tutorials haven’t started yet hmm). Looking forward to tutorial sessions now since I have friends (or sister) in all of my tutorial slots! And it’s really really important for me because I’m mega socially awkward, & most of my mods this sem has group work. Crossing my fingers that we will be able to form our own groups, but hey being assigned to a group isn’t that bad either. Maybe it’s time to make new friends! I really need to learn how to be less awkward/shy around strangers, it’s taking a toll on my social life. Just kidding, that social life of mine is non-existent, though I don’t mind it I guess. Having too many friends can get tiring at times (lol), ‘am satisfied with my life now (:

Met up with one of my closest friends yesterday, received such a thoughtful present that must have taken so much time (‘: Gratified. That’s all I will say, to sum it all up. Turning 19 last year in dec made me see so many things, how heartfelt the people around me can make me feel. Midnight loooong birthday messages/wishes, planned surprises, taking the time to meet up, various awesome presents & what-nots, thoughtful handwritten letters, etc. & even a snail-mailed birthday letter by Amanda, I was so touched :’) Nothing beats a sincere letter snail mailed, sometimes technology gets too in the way of life. So thank you to everyone, because these really do matter to me. And I feel loved. So thank you :* To those who have stuck by me throughout all these times.

Baked CNY goodies with the mum & sis over the weekends, it was pure insane baking from 4pm onwards, & by the time we finished packing up it was approx 1am or so already. Once a year affair, it was fun hee. Though I’m not really a CNY-goodie kind of person! But it was still an interesting experience, and I wanna go venture into different bakes! Super interested in red velvet because it is (one of) the love of my life *o* Maybe during the loong summer holidays, just maybe.

Need to be more motivated and buck up for studies! Overseas trip with friends during June shall be my motivation, but I’ll only feel more at ease/not have to worry about it when the flight tickets are booked so … x fingers, please let this trip come true, I really desperately need a getaway during the summer holidays ): I can imagine the amount of fun we will be experiencing already, because as much as I love going overseas in the comfort of having all my family members with me, it is a different feeling altogether to go with friends (& sister) instead! Ahh plans please be confirmed soon.

A lot of thoughts in my mind, but too lazy to post/don’t wanna post them as of now hmm. Downloaded a new ebook to read, it’s a common read, and I hope it’ll be nice! Scratch that, I know it will be nice already (: On a sidenote, so excited for dinner on Saturday hee ^^

SHOUTOUT TO THE CRAZIEST UNI FRIEND YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE HAHA. BECAUSE I KNOW YOU READ ENDLESSPARADIGM FOR IDK WHAT REASONS IT’S SO BORING BUT YUP HI x

41 Days

 

Everything I gave to you wasn’t for you
It was so that it would feel like nothing to me
Everything that was pointed towards you that wasn’t love
It was only because I wanted to believe that it was
That we’re reachable

 

That light that was brightly shining the dark path in front of me,
I wished for it to be you
But this is already a heart inside a dark shadow
That no one can see

 

/sidenote: Proper post will be up these few days!

Stay golden

glitter-feather-diy-6

Sem 2 is starting in 3 days’ time and … I haven’t managed to secure 5 modules yet. So much for always planning ahead, making my timetable nice with 4-day work weeks & what-nots ): Everything doesn’t work out. Sucks to be a freshie, because the amount of points that we have makes it impossible to compete with the seniors ugh, even with showhand and all, our maximum bid is just, PATHETIC. Currently have 4 modules, x fingers that I’ll be able to get the last module on Monday! Or else, it’s time for yet another backup plan (which I don’t have yet since I’ve exhausted about … 4 backups already yup. That’s how screwed I am)

Otherwise, I’m actually pretty excited to get back to studying I have no idea why at all. Hopefully this motivation/perseverance will be able to last through the entire sem, after all an overseas trip is on the line, can’t risk it! So this sem I’ll be a good girl and make sure that I study hard/conscientiously attend lectures AND tutorials hee. I’ll try.

Returning back to the days where I think too much constantly ): And at times like this, I wonder what would have been of us if we weren’t that screwed up in the past. Maybe things could work out, I don’t know. Too late for regrets or anything, but maybe it wasn’t meant to be after all. Some things in life work so weirdly hmm, I’ll accept it as it is (:

Cannot emphasize how important Thought Catalog is to me in my life, reading through all ’em posts there and mentally agreeing/gaining new insights & perspectives about so many things. Life is definitely not, and shouldn’t be, restricted to just studying. Hopefully I’ll find a proper goal to work towards apart from being a full-time undergraduate! So many aspirations, so many dreams, but ultimately what’s stopping me? I don’t exactly know.

Foresee the coming sem to be a really really tedious/tiring one, but with the tentative overseas trip after the sem, with Avril’s concert in Feb, & among everything else, some fangirling as well, hopefully it will tide me through all the tough times! Took an entire sem to get used (more or less) to uni life, and I’m tired of being the cushion for everyone else on the bell curve. This time, I want to do well too, and be a cushion no more.

2014 has been average, but I’m positive that it will get better from now on! Let’s all be optimistic guys, and make the start of sem 2 in uni a good one YEY.