Why? Why does what was beautiful suddenly shatter in hindsight because it concealed dark truths? Why does the memory of years of happiness turn to gall? Because such a situation makes it impossible to be happy? But we were happy! Sometimes the memory of happiness cannot stay true because it ended unhappily. Because happiness is only real if it lasts forever? Because things always end painfully if they contained pain, conscious or unconscious, all along? But what is unconscious, unrecognized pain?
Finally got the time to just sit down and type a proper post, despite life being so busy – currently juggling between clearing backlog of studies & preparation for Outreach matters. In fact, busy is an understatement, I feel so overwhelmed by the amount of things to do although it’s only the first day of week 2 in school. Wouldn’t call either of the major tasks at hand a burden because they aren’t, but sometimes life really gets too hectic but I guess that’s where proper time management comes in. & consistency is the way to go, so the backlog wouldn’t accumulate till I get buried six feet under within towards the end of the semester.
Things happen, and we learn. Because nobody is perfect, & ultimately everyone makes mistakes. But it’s about the compromise that should be valued, yet clearly neglected in society these days. We are all unique, we are all special in our own ways, and we lack in ways that differ from others – some noticeable on the surface, while some are hidden well but will eventually surface. It’s one thing to be able to accept everyone for who they are, all their flaws & imperfections. It’s another thing (and of a higher level I must say), to be able to accommodate & fit your personality with those of others, to form the perfect puzzle. The ideal team possible, but of course in reality there will be cracks here & there.
Feeling so lethargic as I type this, and I blame 8am lectures (without webcasts). This entire week will literally be Outreach stuff everyday, but no regrets :’) Because I see the meaningfulness in CSC matters, & it serves as a distraction from stress resulting from school work. Yes, there’s stress from YR stuff, but it’s a different kind of stress that pushes one to the fullest potential, & striving to make things better and refined. It’s so heartening to see the number of sign-ups for the talk, hope Outreach will be a success for not only RVPs in Children/Youth sector, but for all RVPs in all 3 sectors hee. Everyone’s really working hard preparing for Outreach, and it’s happening so soon after weeks/months(?) of planning.
Another matter lingering in my head that I have been pondering about over the past few days. Have any of you ever felt, or had the sudden realization, that you have been taking someone for granted? It’s like you’re so comfortable with the fact that someone is constantly appearing in your life, that one day when they decide to go, you can’t help but to be hit with that pang of emptiness. Hollow, confused feelings. What’s the deal with this? It really reminds us the old cliche saying,
Don’t take the people around you for granted.
Cliche, but constantly overlooked & forgotten. I’m not one to display my feelings (except to a few close friends), so as much as I may seem unaffected by it, it’s the truth that it has hit me so hard, more than anyone can ever imagine. Think of someone who you hold the dearest most to in your heart. It can be someone blood-related to you, a lover, friend, or anyone at all. Then, hypothetically think of how you would feel if they were to leave. Hurts as hell right? So start treasuring the people around you, and really, really, stop taking them for granted. Nobody will be there forever because forever is a blatant lie. So live with it, and start appreciating the little things in life from now on.
So tired, both physically & mentally, so here’s hoping for a good rest tonight x