L’appel du vide

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Whenever, wherever; perhaps someday, things will slowly fall into place. Till then, all that’s anticipated shall be mystery. By then, all that’s left might be broken shards.

Haven’t had the time to update endlessparadigm for a while, and it is with utmost regret where I’ve to make a confession ……. I’m typing this while attending a lecture that has lost me since the beginning. This semester, I aim to work harder & take my studies more seriously, but with a higher commitment to studies meant burning out waaaaay faster than I’ve did before.

Fell into a slump for the past week albeit it being week 3 of the term only; but picking up bit by bit & catching up. Headed to the library for a short study session yesterday, which proved to be more productive than I’ve been since school started, so at least I’m heading somewhere (finally) 🙂

Reflections & deep thoughts. These are aspects that I’ve been interested in, but after certain encounters recently I realised how dangerous they can be if not dealt with carefully. For it’s one thing to be able to self-reflect, to engage in productive discussions about topics not commonly treaded on – for they provide new insights & new perspectives. Undoubtedly it’ll make life more meaningful. But what happens from then on? How do you ensure that people, while having a negative outlook in life, still strive for improvement & not just accept it as it is? I’ve seen for myself, people who end up being so pessimistic due to the clarity of their perception of the realities in the world & it’s just so … upsetting to witness.

Anyway, this year I learnt something the hard way. Being in different positions, different stages of life, really provides each individual with a different dominant perspective. These perspectives, when met with different views, clashes frequently & the outcome isn’t pleasant. I used to feel the need to explain myself all the time, to get people to understand why I’m thinking in a certain way – but this year, not anymore. Not everything requires an explanation, not everyone deserves an explanation. Because people who understand, will eventually understand. And those who are resistant to accept other viewpoints, will merely brush off explanations as excuses.

Alright it’s time for my next lecture, till the next time (may it be soon) x

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