Carpe Noctem

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Sometimes we get sad about things and we don’t like to tell other people that we are sad about them. We like to keep it a secret. Or sometimes, we are sad but we really don’t know why we are sad, so we say we aren’t but we really are.

Discussions & conversations surrounding social work in recent weeks have been … thought provoking, to say the least. Not sure what the future entails, uncertain about choices & decisions, tired of trying to figure things out.

Still not really over whatever happened earlier this month. Thought I was stronger than that but nope, it’s still affecting me just as much, if not more. I just don’t show it anymore. As much as I told myself to get over it & move on, it’s harder than it seems. Maybe regression of thoughts back to when things were pleasant served as a momentary escape, but when reality hits, it strikes a million times worse.

So much for trusting. And I can only laugh at the ridiculousness of the accuracy of a past sweeping statement, a foretelling prophecy. How bitter, how ironic. Unfortunately, closure is something that I need, and yet, closure is something I’ll never get. But all I want to ask is,

What happened?

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