Aeipathy

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I want to talk about what happened without mentioning how much it hurt. There has to be a way. To care for the wounds without reopening them. To name the pain without inviting it back into me.

x

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She didn’t want to say but she was falling apart,
she wanted someone to hold her but she was too stubborn to ask.
She will not beg to be loved, she preferred to walk away, to be alone instead.
She mastered the art of faking a smile, a smile that never reached up to her eyes.
Look in them and you will know how they flood every night,
how sorrow and her are lovers that can’t stay apart.
She could take all the pain that came her way, will not say a single word,
but couldn’t stand to see the look of pity for her in someone’s eye.
She pretended like she didn’t care but she had one of the purest heart,
a heart that deserved nothing but love.
She cared about the people she loved,  because she knew how
it felt like to be unwanted.
But no one cared about her, nobody knew how she smiled during the day
and cried herself to sleep every night.
She was surrounded by so many yet she felt lonely…
What’s worse than feeling alone in a room full of people.

x

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Sensitive people are the most genuine and honest people you will ever meet. There is nothing they won’t tell you about themselves if they trust your kindness. However, the moment you betray them, reject them or devalue them, they become the worse type of person. Unfortunately, they end up hurting themselves in the long run. They don’t want to hurt other people. It is against their very nature. They want to make amends and undo the wrong they did. Their life is a wave of highs and lows. They live with guilt and constant pain over unresolved situations and misunderstandings. They are tortured souls that are not able to live with hatred or being hated. This type of person needs the most love anyone can give them because their soul has been constantly bruised by others. However, despite the tragedy of what they have to go through in life, they remain the most compassionate people worth knowing, and the ones that often become activists for the broken hearted, forgotten and the misunderstood. They are angels with broken wings that only fly when loved.

x

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I’ve got a bad case of the 3:00 am guilts – you know, when you lie in bed awake and replay all those things you didn’t do right? Because, as we all know, nothing solves insomnia like a nice warm glass of regret, depression and self-loathing.

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